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asalaam aleikumCheki Presidaa Bush akikwepa kiatu kilichorushwa na journalist wa Iraq
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MichuziBlogV2
Most read Swahili blog on earth
Sorry this is OT but it is so funny. I got it today and I would like to share this with those who believe a laughter a day keeps the doctor away
ReplyDeleteDear Wife:
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.
I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell.
Your boss called to tell me
that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to
sleep after watching all of your soaps.
You don't tell me you love me
anymore, you don't want sex anymore or anything.
Either you're cheating
on me or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband:
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a
far cry from what you've been.
I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work.
I did notice when you got a hair cut last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a girl!" but my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say anything nice.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
I turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers on because the price tag was still on them.I prayed that it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning ... And your silk boxers were $49.99.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out.
So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica but
when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted.
My lawyer said that with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me.
So take care.
Signed
Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S.
I don't know if I ever told you this but Carla, my sister, was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem.
Michuzi
ReplyDeleteKatika pekua pekua zangu nimekutana na hii link:
http://www.okonda.com/please_save_my_people.html
Watanzania tutoe mchango gani kuwasaidia wenzetu wa DRC vita iishe hususani kwa kuwaondoa na kuwaandama hadharani wanaosupport vita kama inavyojieleza kwenye hiyo link. Mi nasikitishwa sana na maatizo ya Africa, tujaribu na sisi lolote jema tutakaloweza. Nadhani tunaweza kuwashinikiza wahusika waache unyama na kuponea migongo ya wenzao huku wakiua wasio na hatia. Rwanda na Uganda wapo kwenye hiyo migogoro! Hiyo federation wanyoitaka haraka haraka ndo tutaingia kwenye msukosuko kama huu jamani? Kenya na Rwanda wamejiunga katika ajira ya pamoja. Natumaini waafrika tuna uwezo wa kuleta mabadiliko kwa wenzetu na sisi wenyewe, tuwe wawazi na kuweka ufisadi pembeni.
wADAU,
ReplyDeleteLabda wa Iraq wakumbuke huyu presidaa anatoka TEXAS kwa wapanda farasi na kuchezea Pistor,hivyo ni Bw. Bush ni pure (COWBOY),ndio ndio maana imekuwa rahisi kukwepa hicho kiatu cha huyo muendeleza libeneke.
Ahsante mdau wa sweden,inaonekana walinzi wake(Bush) wanasinzia.mtu hawezi kurusha viatu viwili kabla ya kudakwa.Ingekuwa pisto si angemmaliza?Sifurahii hicho kitendo kwa rais lakini rais bush nadhani ana-deserve....
ReplyDeletewell kinacho nishangaza mimi ni ulizi wa huyu bwana , yani all the way hakukuwahii kutokea kitu cha namna hii sasa anamaliza ndo walinzai wanajifanya hawammind! si vyema hivyo jamani!
ReplyDeletesasa hicho kipondo hata kaa asahau bora angejilipua kuliko kujiacha kazi kweli kweli
Kweli nilifikiri nime pose na watch Comedy central for a second! Baada ya kuangalia vizuri kumbe ni kweli... kingempata cha kichwa basi tena... sasa hivi tungekuwa tunasimulia mengine. Pole sana Bush ... but the shoe was only size 10....!! au sio! Walinzi...wake up and do your job thoroughly! Acheni kusinzia hovyo!!! Bush amekwepa utafikiri alicheza rede zamani!! I am proud of you son.... Na hivi vita vilivyomaliza ndugu zao wengi bila sababu... kweli yaonyesha jinsi gani Watu wana hasira sana.... kuwa mwangalifu!
ReplyDeleteKwa walio umri wangu watakuwa walisoma katika somo la kiswahili (kitabu cha Tujifunze Lugha Yetu) hadithi ya jinsi Kibanga alivyomsweka makofi mkoloni. Nafikiri ikiitwa Kibanga ampiga mkoloni. How interesting to see that there is always a Kibanga somewhere - only that this one had an arabic name - Muntadar al-Zaidi. Tofauti ni kwamba Kibanga original alimpata ngumi ya shavu mkoloni wakati huyu kamkosa kwa sentimenta - lakini kajaribu.
ReplyDeleteKweli demokrasia inafanya kazi.
ReplyDeleteIngekuwa enzi za Saddam Hussein angethubutu kufanya hivyo ?
KUMBE VIATU NI HATARI!!
ReplyDeleteHiyo kali ya karne!! Rais wa dunia arushiwa viatu viwili mfululizo vikilenga kichwani. Security yote ile kumbe hakuna kitu. Hawa waandishi wa habari kumbe ni hatari. Baada ya upekuzi wa nguvu uliofanywa na watu wa usalama ikaonekana wote walioingia ukumbini ni salama kumbe viatu vinaweza kutumika kama silaha. Kwa hali hiyo next time waandishi wa habari watatumia kamera zao kuwarushia viongozi wa kitaifa mara wakiwa na kero nao.
Haya bwana Bush pole sana kwa mkasa lakini pia nakupongeza kwa kujilinda mwenyewe.
Nakumbuka hata JK wakati wa kampeni za urais 2005 alipokuwa Mwanza naye aliwahi kukamatwa mguu na kijana mmoja akitaka amwangushe toka jukwaani lakini aliweza kijilinda. Hivyo kwa viongozi, wajaribu kuwa wanafanya mazoezi ya kujilinda wao wenyewe pia wasitegemee sana walinzi.
Mdau
IN IRAQ'S NORMS, VALUES AND TRADITIONS, THAT IS A BIG INSULT, TO THROUGH SHOES TO YOUR OPPONENT, NI MATUSI MAKUBWA SANA KWA MILA YA KI-IRAQ, IT IA A KINDA OF UME-DEVALUE ADUI YAKJO NI KAMA MAVI HIVI.
ReplyDelete